Music for Tykes

The boys have been in daycare for a year now. It has been a learning experience for us all.

We chose a community run daycare center for several reasons - location, cost and food. Yes food - our daycare center serves breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks a day - and usually the breakfast and lunch are hot meals. What our center lacks is extras like the "special programs", music & sports offered at the pricey daycares (which don't serve meals or charge mucho extra for that convenience).

Since then, I've been a mom with a mission! I have music experience! I have experience teaching music to young folks, I enjoy being goofy...my only obstical is WORK. Last year when I first thought up the idea of going to the daycare and offering special music days I was still working for Atilla the Hun, but I was in the midst of a transfer. And yes now I work for better folk, but it is still Corporate America and asking for a few hours off once a month (which was my original thought) is like asking for the keys to the corporate bank accounts. (Not that they have any problems asking you to work extra hours on a weekly basis). So, I haven't quite gotten up the gumption to ask....yet.
What I have done is to do it on my own time. The first one was last Halloween. I used some vacation days to have a long weekend over Halloween - with the intent of doing some extra things for the holiday with the kids and doing some extra fall housecleaning. I also offered the daycare a special music program for the kids ....
I figured I'd bring my violin and do the usual nursery rhymes etc - then the director asked me what my "Program" was going to be - which forced me to really think about it. Thank goodness! I went in with a plan.
At the time, my boys had been listening to one of my chant cd's in the car and LOVED the song Grandmother Moon. They would call to Grandma Moon during full moon nights and sing along with the chant. So...since at Halloween the dark hours are growing - I decided to do Moon and Stars - Our friends as the theme.
I had Twinkle little Star, Grandmother Moon and a couple of other songs, a book "The Moon Comes Home", and in a couple of the rooms I used Elaine Silver's "Half Moon Rising" . Beyond that I did Happy Birthday where appropriate, and kids favorites. I played in the rooms for each age group - and had a different wonderful experience in each room. One thing that did stay the same - from 12 mos up - each kid had the opportunity to help me play the fiddle.
My next opportunity came on MLK day. Miraculously my company gives this as a holiday, but daycare is open. This time I went without a theme - and it was OK. Having lived through the experience once - I knew what to expect from the age groups. I must say, that the pre-school teacher is one of my best friends when I do this. She would really LOVE it if I could do this REGULARLY and build on what I'm doing. She has repeatedly offered to do prep lessons or followup lessons with the kids.
I guess I just have to get up the gumption to ask for a few hours once a month from my boss...it really wouldn't cost him anything. I already work overtime....

Happy Imbolc! Spring is almost Here!

IMBOLC

The feeling in this still dark, unstable, muddy time
that the light at the end of the tunnel is my own soul
staring back at me on the inside
and I'm blind as a mole pushing through
some primal unseen path
with my stubby little snout and inexplicable will
If winter is a wide ocean of night
January is the hollow point, the trough
that holds visions too deep to fish up into morning
it is a cave too far down for light or even hunger
life hibernating in me suspended, waiting
and the mind floating free of the body now
like something promising but unborn
I want to lean over my own self to see if I'm breathing
I want to regress into a world of fur and blood
I am as slow as a stone's pulse
Into this no place, no thing
Imbolc comes at the end of forever
and the begining of all time
Suddenly there is one fiercely yellow crocus open
dreams pierce dense and soggy layers of sleep
right up into the thin clear air of day
just like the red torpedo shoots of peonies
pierce the ground by my back door
carrying all the courage that weeks later they will need
to unfurl those painfully delicate new leaves
I am asking for that courage, Mother
I'm ready as I'm gonna be
nothing more to wait for
just hold my hand while my eyes stumble into light

Miriam Dyak 1994

Catching Up - OR - HOLIDAY FRENZY!!!

Whew! It's been a CRAZY RIDE!

The holiday season just blew by us this year - but not without much activity and sharing joy with our kids and family and friends.

Early in December our town hosted a "Pictures with Santa" event. This was the first year that "SANTA" had meaning for both boys...so, we took the boys and watched Santa arrive via Fire engine. Then we waited in line for our turn to talk to Santa and have our picture taken. When it came to our turn Ronnie didn't even hesitate this year - and because Evan does EVERYTHING Ronnie does - he paused only a couple of seconds before joining his brother. This was the first time we actually heard that Ronnie had a definite 'Wish List' and there was only 1 item on it - a tunnel...from that point we had a mission - to find out what he meant by tunnel.
The answer came during the next week - after grammy paged through the TRU catalog with him - it was a TRAIN TUNNEL!

Over the course of the next couple of weeks we had several cookie baking sessions - some which included small boys, and some which did not. Ronnie is a MOST ENTHUSIASTIC participant in kitchen activities, and was VERY proud of his cookie efforts! As this was Mommy's first year in a LONG time to actually bake, it was time very well spent! And MUCH appreciated by Daddy!

We celebrated the Winter Solstice as a family, by noting how far to the south the sun rose (it was to the right of our LARGE pine tree) - and trying to remember where it rose in the summer(much farther to the left over our greenhouse we think). As observed from our kitchen's bay window, this is a VERY wide arc of rising points. In the evening we celebrated by extinguishing all of the lights in the house to symbolize the dark time - then we began to bring back the light by lighting a small candle for each one of us -we then went through the house turning on all of the lights to help us remember that the darkness won't last forever and that the sun's course has changed to bring back the light again.
We bought our tree - in our family's tradition - close to the last moment - Dec 23 - and brought it inside. We decorated it on Christmas Eve when we had another small housefull of guests - Grammy, Grampy and Auntie Jill. The boys were exstatic - and VERY excited! Ronnie set out the cookies for Santa - and both wanted Grammy to put them to bed, but the excitement was so high that it took Mommy and Daddy to do the job that night! Then we had to stay up getting the train table setup and the presents under the tree!

Christmas day was AMAZING this year! The boys loved opening their gifts - were SO happy with everything they got - which was A LOT! And SO happy to play with it all. Nap-time was non-existant - there was FAR too much excitement for that!

We had our dinner at my brother's new house this year. It was delicious and the kids had a blast....all 4 of them running like crazy people around the downstairs hallways!

The boys' daycare closes for the 'week between', so I was home with the boys all week. We got in some play time with friends we don't see very often which was very nice. It was my intent to have Evan pottie trained during this week, but he had other ideas....
And then all too soon, it was New Year's Eve. Again, this year, we played dominoes with a couple of friends - a quiet and relaxing ringing in of the new year.

Hope every one had a wonderful holiday - however you celebrated - filled with family fun and magical moments!

To Grey or not to Grey - THAT is the question

In the week since I wrote my last entry I've mentioned the grey cover up and wanting my greys back to several people.
The first was my friend Terry....she was all for it.
Terry expressed that she looks for them and is excited by them - they are her badges of honor.
Apparently she, and I, are in the minority here.
Every other woman I have mentioned this to has had the following to say:

"OH NO! COVER THEM UP!"

"I'm NOT taking them siting down - I'm going kicking and screaming!"

and combinations of the above.

I don't have a problem with hair coloring per sey, heck - I've done quite a few auburn color washes - just to have that red that I've always wanted...it's just that I don't have a problem with accepting grey hair as a mark of your years, and wearing it proudly either.

Isn't it better to have lived long enough and interesting enough lives that we got the greys?
Anyhow, let me know how YOU feel about this.

The view from 40

Ok...I'll admit it. I've been having a mid-life crisis - for about a month.

I never thought my age would bother me. I have given out big fanfares for more people than I can count because "age is a badge of honor" "we have made it to this place in our lives".

I believed it then; I believe it now.

BUT all of the sudden - it was NOVEMBER 2006.

It snuck up on me like a laughing pixie. I noticed every grey hair (which I had thusfar refused to cover with"permanent" dye); felt every ache; felt tired when my little ones wanted to play....and felt AGED.
The weekend before my birthday was probably the height of the crisis....during the kids' nap time, instead of doing all of the things I regularly do, I sneeked up the back stairs to the master bath and pulled out the box of "emergency" hair dye" - the permanent kind.

I took a deep breath cut off the seals and colored my hair...no one even noticed. Not at home, not at work.
Then came the day....my husband had the kids sing me happy birthday...gave me a gift...had my parents watch the kids while we went to New Hope and Lambertville for the day....when we got home we had ice-cream cake with my parents and the kids. It was a very nice day, but TOTALLY ANTI-CLIMATIC.

In the week that followed I got over the crisis...realized that I didn't really feel any older than I had 20 years ago and I went back to living my normal hectic life; trying to comfort a sick husband... trying to work-from home with a sick child... making plans for the coming winter holidays... making plans to get together with friends...
But if still felt as though another shoe was about to drop --
On Thursday night my "big" present came - hubby had gotten me a new dell laptop with wifi and the upgraded battery pack...this baby can go anywhere - no wires - YAY!! Seems he thought my current home computer was a bit out-dated (I bought it in 1997).
So it was over, right?
Well, Saturday, as I was walking into a Chili contest Clark had entered - SURPRISE! Family and friends old and new had gathered.

Dad and"uncle" Jerry were playing music, many had brought food and drink, and Donna had made THE MOST INCREDIBLE/ BEAUTIFUL/ MAGICAL CAKE! It was wonderful!!!
BUT, With the way the past few years have had me flitting in and out of people's lives, I felt unworthy of all of the love, affection, and attention. And especially unworthy of the hugs the little folk - some who barely knew me - dispensed freely. But the other shoe had indeed dropped.

On Sunday evening - after an afternoon of "Simply Cook It - the home version" with a couple of friends - I was finally back to where I started, but my friend Terry expressed it so much better in an email on Monday, so I'll share her words:
As far as I'm concerned, we've worked hard to get where we are. We've more than put in the time and the effort. We've earned every year and we should all be proud.

Ok - where's the remover? I want my greys back!

Giving Thanks

As the kids are taking their nap I'm taking time to sit back and reflect - ....I think I spent too many years on my own with the ability to have things "just so" to have things stay cleaned up for more than a couple of hours...etc - in those days I was sad - because I didn't have anyone to share life with. And now I get aggrivated every day with all of the little things that pile up - that need to get done over and over and over because of little messes.

The fact is - I wouldn't change any of it. I love my kids, I love my husband, I love the process of keeping the house, and the garden...I even really like my job - ok mostly - The problem is that there is just not enough time to do it all well...to take my time with it and enjoy it in the moment as much as I'd like.

This year has been a year of settling in - to the house, to the marriage and being together all of the time, to the kids - now that Evan is more of a participant....

My goal for next year is to stop worrying about what can't get done - and to enjoy what can be done more. To be in love with my life as much as I love my life - so that I show it more to all of the people I love.

This year, I am thankful for:

My children they are bright active and fun...healthy sassy and LOUD! They make life exciting and wonderful!

MY husband -who is the best daddy I know, loves our family, works hard making our house a home we can be proud of, allows me time for myself and accepts me for who I am.

My parents - who helped us make it through the year. From staying with us when the 4 of us had a stomach virus to keeping the kids for several weekends and Shakespeare evenings so Clark and I could do things as a couple.

My spirit sisters - for being there and listening and understanding and sharing life's ups and downs.

Grammy, Jill, Leana, Donna, Kim and Lizyy for emergency childcare!!!

Leana & Clyde for MANY evenings of dominoes, tea and chocolates!

My job - that I got a new one with a decent boss and moved to the Morristown office.

Blaize - for all of the years of companionship and love and loyalty and mouse hunting.

Halloween Fun!

Halloween was a BIG event at our house this year.
I took Monday and Tuesday off so that I could do more with the boys, but the festivities began on Friday night!
Friday night was the day care center's Halloween Party - and they went all-out!!! The entry had a smoke machine and the lights in the whole building were dim to start...each of the offices/rooms was decorated and the staff were dressed up and handing out treats. Then there were refreshments in the cafeteria. For this event the boys dressed in last-year's costumes - and were "SUPER BOYS"!
Saturday we had a gathering of family and friends in the late -afternoon/ evening to celebrate the late harvest and to honor those who have gone before us. It was a rainy day, so the pumpkin soup I made was well received! We also feasted on pieroghi casserole with mushroom sauce, spinach casserole, chicken and beef satay, rack of lamb, sesame noodles, stuffed butternut squash, fresh bread and apple desserts. It was YUMMY!
On Sunday we held a tie-dying session - the first since just after our wedding....although it was cold and windy MANY items were dyed. Ronnie got to dye his beach towel for next summer and it came out nicely! Next time we'll get the boys more involved in this - when we remember to do it in warmer weather!!!!
Monday I cleaned house - it needed it after the weekend!!! And picked up the boys early from daycare to carve our jack-o-lanterns. Ronnie was definitely into it more than Evan. He directed the carving - The big pumpkin was to have triangle eyes and nose and some teeth! The smaller one needed circle eyes and nose and a "scarey mouth".
Tuesday I spent the morning at the day care center - violin in hand - doing some musical activities with each of the rooms. My theme for the day was "Moons and Stars" who keep us company through the dark time of the year. I played "Half-Moon Rising" (from one of Elaine Silver's cds), sang "Grandmother Moon", "Twinkle Twinkle" and I told them the story "The Moon Comes Home". The older kids loved the singing and dancing...the younger kids were just amazed at the violin. I let ALL of the kids(12 mos to 5yrs) take a turn helping me play! In the afternoon Grammy came to visit and we were all joined by Aunt Julie and Uncle Jim and cousins Caity Fiona and Seamus to go trick-or-treating. This year Ronnie clearly told me weeks in advance that he was going to be "BOB the BUILDER" and Evan said "Fireman"!!! So, that's what we were! Of course Mommy dressed up like...."a Witch"!
It was a wonderful holiday!!